Unrequited, like it's essence does not promise returns.
I am not sure how it turns out to be fulfilling all the time: There's anguish, and regrets, and demands but a whole lot of abundant acceptance.
These friendships often never intrude the uninhibited zones.
And happen to leave behind a plethora of lifelong mystries.
Why did my best friend who walked me through my first ever school competition wasn't that heartwarming when I returned with the winning trophy to hand it over to her?
Why after explaining the difference between a 'Fast' and a 'Best' friend she had to give up on me the exact moment I was about to let the world know she's chosen to be my savior?
Why did it hurt when on the Friendship's Day, the wrist band she gave me was exactly the same like for the others?
Why would her lunch suddenly finish up right before I would rush to join her and expect to eat from each other's tiffin boxes, just like the old times?
Our crush for the same guy with dimples, my Mom trusting her more with handling my tantrums, my sister getting jealous of our Friendship, my Dad asking her to never leave my side while I'm on my bicycle -- her holding hands and being the support shoulder to a common friend, being ignorant of the fact that I feel abandoned, her sharing the class notes and hand made cards with the entire school and juniors but me, not waiting up anymore to wish me before I enter my allotted classroom for mid-term examinations, not even calling me by the name she used to.
My first friendship with my best friend who taught me all about it ended with the two of us just deciding to not cycle to school together anymore. I asked Mom to send my sister and I, just the two of us and nobody else.
I felt my possessive bits wanting to go hug her and bring her home to savor our favorite 'Orange' ice-cream. By then, she had already found a distraction in other friendships.
The last time I saw her was before leaving the city. I was returning with my Dad from school with all my certificates for the Board results. Dad congratulated her for scoring well in the exams. She did not take the sweets he offered her, though. That's when our eyes met and I meant the goodbye.
Until recent, I had been living friendships just like a ritual. There might be procedures but not necessarily the devotion. And one fine day, when the Sun shone bright, I was told I would be always valued as a friend because no matter if all the other chips go down, the friendship will keep us together.
The Light I thought I was following all this while said Friendship is particular and a certain way.
What I have been feeling now is Friendship is irreplaceable and a replacement, a security and a complete give-in, a promise and defying each one to make some more, a stay and a walkaway.
Like your favorite flower in the garden of Life, it shall surround you with the perfume of belongingness. But Roses will give way to Tulips one day, and Lilies to Forget-me-nots. That's the deal, you cannot expect them to hang on.
When I choose to see things both scared and carefree again, my Virgo asks me to not lose faith.
I will be made to stay in the Friendship so that no other definition binds me, to not let me be.
I am not sure how it turns out to be fulfilling all the time: There's anguish, and regrets, and demands but a whole lot of abundant acceptance.
These friendships often never intrude the uninhibited zones.
And happen to leave behind a plethora of lifelong mystries.
Why did my best friend who walked me through my first ever school competition wasn't that heartwarming when I returned with the winning trophy to hand it over to her?
Why after explaining the difference between a 'Fast' and a 'Best' friend she had to give up on me the exact moment I was about to let the world know she's chosen to be my savior?
Why did it hurt when on the Friendship's Day, the wrist band she gave me was exactly the same like for the others?
Why would her lunch suddenly finish up right before I would rush to join her and expect to eat from each other's tiffin boxes, just like the old times?
Our crush for the same guy with dimples, my Mom trusting her more with handling my tantrums, my sister getting jealous of our Friendship, my Dad asking her to never leave my side while I'm on my bicycle -- her holding hands and being the support shoulder to a common friend, being ignorant of the fact that I feel abandoned, her sharing the class notes and hand made cards with the entire school and juniors but me, not waiting up anymore to wish me before I enter my allotted classroom for mid-term examinations, not even calling me by the name she used to.
My first friendship with my best friend who taught me all about it ended with the two of us just deciding to not cycle to school together anymore. I asked Mom to send my sister and I, just the two of us and nobody else.
I felt my possessive bits wanting to go hug her and bring her home to savor our favorite 'Orange' ice-cream. By then, she had already found a distraction in other friendships.
The last time I saw her was before leaving the city. I was returning with my Dad from school with all my certificates for the Board results. Dad congratulated her for scoring well in the exams. She did not take the sweets he offered her, though. That's when our eyes met and I meant the goodbye.
Until recent, I had been living friendships just like a ritual. There might be procedures but not necessarily the devotion. And one fine day, when the Sun shone bright, I was told I would be always valued as a friend because no matter if all the other chips go down, the friendship will keep us together.
The Light I thought I was following all this while said Friendship is particular and a certain way.
What I have been feeling now is Friendship is irreplaceable and a replacement, a security and a complete give-in, a promise and defying each one to make some more, a stay and a walkaway.
Like your favorite flower in the garden of Life, it shall surround you with the perfume of belongingness. But Roses will give way to Tulips one day, and Lilies to Forget-me-nots. That's the deal, you cannot expect them to hang on.
When I choose to see things both scared and carefree again, my Virgo asks me to not lose faith.
I will be made to stay in the Friendship so that no other definition binds me, to not let me be.
Sun keeps shining irrespective of the like or discomfort it earns for itself.The moonlight is always soothing without like or dislike.Nature shows the real art of living without hoping for like or dislike.Try to be such type of personality whose skills and behaviour are socially acceptable.
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